If You Want It, Get Serious

A sweet girl in her late twenties
approached me in tears;
her attempts to play piano
with her church band
had been a "hot mess,"
as she termed it.

She came to me, a music teacher, in hopes of encouragement, not even sure if she should continue pursuing her musical goals. She was very emotional, upset about her stumbles, doubted that her church band even wanted her, or questioned if she had misunderstood her purpose in the first place. Her emotional needs were the first concern. I told her I understood, because I've had those moments when my fingers just slipped all over the keys, and a performance I had felt great about simply fell flat. I reminded her she'd just driven in from out-of-town, not feeling well, then was handed a bunch of new music and introduced to new musicians she had never played with. "The next practice might not be so bad," I tried to encourage her. "If they're playing with new musicians, it might just take a few weeks to get in sync with each other." 



That is the emotional side of me. The part of me that can empathize, relate, and recall similar moments when I have been (or still am) in those same shoes. But sometimes people deserve empathy and honesty---sincere, thoughtful honesty that might help push them forward.

Technically, intellectually, a lot of her struggles were coming from practice and preparation flaws---trying to learn an instrument within a schedule already overflowing with commitments, practice sessions that were brief and rushed, always practicing the same way and drilling in mistakes, practicing in 'ruts,' not pushing herself into anything new, trying to skip the minute details which are needed to build musical foundations, quickly giving up on songs because they're "too hard," endeavoring to lead an entire worship service in music when she was not yet comfortable accompanying. Shortcuts. We adults get in a hurry for shortcuts. I wanted her to walk away knowing that, despite having a bad night which can definitely affect our performances, she did have power to change this.

"Look," I leaned toward her, "If you think you're supposed to do music, you said you've prayed about it and feel like God has been leading you to that....then get serious about it! You also felt like God wanted you to be a nurse, but look how hard you worked to get there; he didn't just pick you up and drop you smack in the middle of the medical field! You have spent hours and hours studying, working, and preparing for that. If you feel like you are meant to do music in church, that requires a commitment too. That requires a lot of effort and discipline besides just going to a lesson or showing up on Sunday mornings. Sit down and write out your schedule and see if you are going to be able to carve in time to make this a priority..... If you want this enough to get serious about it, then I believe you can do it."


And those are the words I want to say to people in general, often musicians, but anyone attempting a goal they consider worthwhile and important. After a while, the importance seems to fade, the desire to bring our very best burns out, we forget about preparedness and just prepare to show up. We forget that great opportunity comes with great responsibility. Something that used to be our top priority barely even makes the list. We think 'commitment' simply means knowing what general time to be there and 'effort' means figuring out a few chords before the service starts.

Sometimes our half-hearted efforts to get us by.....get us by. But maybe we should try for more. Maybe we should sift through our lives, decide which goals really mean the most to us, and make those our priority again.

In other words, if it really means something to you, get serious about it.