Disregarded

I lay on the examining table for my second appointment of the week. For a long time, I had been having trouble with a medical problem that doctors just couldn't quite pinpoint and agree on.

"Where does most of the pain seem to be coming from?" the physical therapist asked.

Gesturing with my hands, I began describing the symptoms I have been struggling to describe to doctors for the past five years. But this time, I didn't express the ailments from my own perspective; I relayed another medical explanation a doctor had given for the possible cause of my pain.

The physical therapist shook his head and gave a small point in my direction, "No," he said, "where do YOU feel like the pain is coming from?"

The words in his simple, direct question at least brought a measure of healing,
if only to my emotions,
because sometimes the message life seems to send me is this:

"Your opinion doesn't matter---" 


*perhaps because I don't do prestigious work that often gains human respect simply from being in a powerful, high-earning position.


*maybe because I don't have a personality that typically throws fits over trivial details not to my liking, whereas people often cater to tantrum-throwers to avoid their reactions.


*perhaps because people have expectations that I should always be the nice girl who goes along with everything, no matter how I feel about it.

*maybe because people don't consider me talented or capable enough for my contributions to be viewed as important or needed.

I've heard of single people who feel it----that their absence of marriage means others dismiss their opinions on relationships.

I've heard of stay-at-home moms who feel it---that their vacancy from the workplace means others discard their ideas or intellect.

Life sometimes seems to tell us that,
while other people's opinions matters,
ours do not,
thus making the question, "What do YOU feel about this?" some of the most affirming words we hear.

When has life told you your opinion doesn't matter?